Helpless

Friday 10 August, 2012

In January 2011 I had a melanoma, category level 5, cut from my forehead. I did not think much of it.

In November 2011 I noticed a lump forming behind my right ear. After an initial biopsy in a hospital, it was deemed OK now at level 3B.

Thankfully my specialist did not trust the findings. Another biopsy in his surgery showed melanoma.

Within 3 days I had an 8-hour operation in which 72 lymph nodes were taken out plus a gland. All seemed positive as the melanoma seemed to be encased within one lymph node.

In January 2012 I started to lose weight. I was watching what I ate and exercised so I put it down to good eating and living. I lost 8kg. My check up with my specialist showed a melanoma like spot on my neck, which turned out to be melanoma, but a level-1 case. No problems. I had a PET scan and all was clear.

In July 2012 I had my 3-month check up. He obviously saw a dramatic change and ordered another PET scan. It showed cancer in my bowel and in two lymph nodes in the bowel area. Now level 4. Can't go any further.

Booked into see a surgeon and was told it was inoperable because there were also many polyps seen. I am now in the stage of trying to see if I can get the B raf drug, as my prognosis is maybe 6 to 12 months. I am trying to stay positive. Sometimes I drink too much. I have started smoking heavily, and trying to supress my depression. To see the hurt in my beautiful wife's eyes and the complete and utter devastation in my 2 girls is so hard. Is there anyone else out there in my situation? If so, I feel for you and your loved ones.

The wait to see if I can be B raf suitable is taking forever. It's so frustrating, I feel so bloody helpless.


If you or someone you love is affected by cancer, contact our Cancer Helpline on 13 11 20 to speak with one of our experienced cancer nurses. 

Updated: 10 Aug, 2012