A mother's legacy

“I imagine a world where a son or a child doesn’t have to grow up without having their mother in their life.” - Martin

When Martin lost his mother to cancer as a child, it left a permanent mark on him and his two brothers. It was the 1960s, it was a different time. There were fewer effective treatments for cancer, and the importance of support wasn’t fully realised.

“I was 12 when she passed away, but the trauma of no emotional support at all for my two brothers and myself. That's affected all of us to this day,” shared Martin.

Living in country Victoria, he and his brothers would travel with their dad to the hospital in Melbourne, but the boys weren’t allowed to see their mum.

“The medical profession decided that children shouldn't see someone sick in hospital,” said Martin. “So, we're in the car outside waiting for Dad, we never got to say goodbye.”

Martin describes his mother as very “community focused”, bringing her three sons up to be “caring, respectful and honest”. And while he says his first 12 years were formative and “beautiful”, he’s painfully aware of how different the rest of his childhood would have been if he hadn’t lost his mother.

His younger brother blocked out the first 10 years of his life to cope, his older brother wouldn’t talk about it, and his father turned to alcohol. At just 15, Martin left home.

The trauma Martin and his brothers experienced and the lack of support during that time was what eventually brought Martin to seek information and support from Cancer Council Victoria as an adult.

“I found that very comforting to get all that information that I never had for 20-30 years,” said Martin. “I’m a big believer in talking and having that support.”

Martin became a passionate supporter of Cancer Council Victoria's work and eventually made the decision to leave a gift in his Will to support Cancer Council Victoria’s work long into the future.

“Funding is critical. Every dollar Cancer Council Victoria can get for research is going to help people going forward,” shared Martin.

His ultimate dream? Sitting down with CEO Todd Harper over a coffee and talking over what programs his gift could go to - chatting to the research heads, looking at the top four research programs and knowing his money will be put to good use. Which he was able to do at a recent event.

“To me it's a legacy of my mother, respecting her as a person and what she contributed in her life. She was 53 when she passed away, so to me that's part of that legacy of respecting my mother and what she did for her three boys.”